Week 9: Forgiveness

We have continued to eliminate negative thinking, label read, recognize the importance of breathing, add positive affirmations into our daily lives, eliminate high fructose corn syrup (fructose as well) & dyes from our diet, sit in silence within nature for 30 minutes a day, set goals in our lives and eliminate preservatives from the diet. This week, we are going to practice forgiveness.

Forgiveness is a tough one for almost anyone. I am a very forgiving person, yet I don’t forget. However, the gift in forgiveness isn’t necessarily for the other person, even if they are the one needing forgiveness. Forgiveness is for yourself! Once you forgive another, show compassion in your heart… you are free! You are not responsible for what they do with that forgiveness. You are only accountable for yourself.

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Many times things weigh heavy in our hearts. We want apologies. We want recognition for someone hurting us, whether intentional or not. Sometimes, the person that we feel wronged us owes it to us to make it right. Sadly, all too often, we will be waiting for eternity with that heaviness in our hearts. That heaviness may or may not be hurting the other person, but it is definitely hurting you. That is where we owe it to ourselves to just let go, send love and acknowledge that it is out of our hands. It is important to understand that it is not our job to judge, just forgive and love… no matter what!

Now this can often get confused with forgive & forget. Don’t get me wrong. It is necessary with forgiveness to move on and let it go. But what I mean by not forgetting is that you can forgive someone, but that doesn’t mean you have to let things go back to how they used to be or even expect that person to change like they claim they will. You don’t have to let them back into your life in order for them to hurt you or those that you love again. It means that you can forgive, let go and move on… expecting nothing in return from them. It is important through forgiveness to still love and honor yourself. Forgiveness for others helps you solidify this self-love. But it is important to not waive your rights in personal happiness in order to be treated with honor, respect and love in return.

I have personally had a few relationships in my life where I have struggled to find it in my heart to forgive. I was so angry, hurt, bitter and in one case completely torn apart and left with a hole in my heart that will never be replaced. I carried the burden of those people’s choices each day as I held on to that anger. It served no one, mostly not myself, by not forgiving. But I made sure that I rose above it. I knew I was only hurting myself. If those people were truly sorry, then they were too proud to admit it and tell me. So I was waiting for nothing and I could wait for nothing for forever. It took time to come to terms with that conclusion.

The universe offers forgiveness in many forms and opportunities. One way that I was finally able to let go in a certain situation was to speak in front of a large group about my pain and loss that resulted from the decisions of others. Once I let it all out and shared the story, a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. I am still hurt as this pain will never go away, but I forgive them for their choices. I just have to keep in my heart that they were doing what they felt was right and leave it at that.

Like all things in life, lessons take time sometimes. With all of the above being said, it is important that in forgiving others that we remember that we are not perfect. There is someone out there seeking our apology as we may be seeking someone else’s. We are all guilty throughout life in hurting someone else. So make sure that you aren’t like those that hurt you. Tell them you are sorry! Even if it is 20 years down the road, it is never too late. If that person never learned the lesson of forgiveness, give them that gift and help them in that area. It may change their entire life and you may have that power in another’s happiness. Forgiveness is always in your hands!

The bottom line, be the best person that you can be! Honor, cherish, respect and love everyone and everything in the world. Find compassion and empathy in your soul. Through compassion and love, all things can be dissolved into purity.

Good luck this week with letting go! Through practicing this over the next few weeks, you will see how your heart lightens and life just starts to flow a bit differently. Always remember, your heart deserves it!

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Resources:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/amanda-slavin/the-importance-of-forgive_b_1556629.html

http://msue.anr.msu.edu/news/the_importance_of_forgiveness

http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692

 

 

 

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